Day Twenty-Four: From Trash to Treasure...

For as long as I can remember, I have been a seeker of "things"...  As a child, no matter what setting I was in, it seemed there was something for me to find.  At my grandparents' house in Michigan it was fossils;  At our summer house in New Hampshire it was frogs and salamanders.  At my own house it was hide and seek with my neighborhood friends.  And at the beach it was seashells and sea glass.

Today, as I continue to seek out novel experiences it strikes me that things have not changed all that much.   Though the things I seek out are sometimes different, I am still a seeker at heart.  And so, it seems, is my son...  

In a sunshine inspired moment, I decided to take my son and daughter to the beach by myself today.  So after strapping my daughter into the front pack, I let Liam run.

After realizing that seeking seagulls to bring home is a futile act, he turned his attention to the ground and started handing me his treasures:  a rock, litter, seaweed, a clump of sand, a shell, and some sea glass...

While I have given up many of my childhood collections, there are still few activities I enjoy more than walking on the beach looking for sea glass.  There's something about a piece of trash, thrown into the ocean by a careless hand, that comes back to shore all smooth, polished and gorgeous from its time in the sea, that inspires me.  I love the transformation sea glass must go through, from trash to treasure, and it's become a metaphor for the perseverance and resilience of my clients, my loved ones, and myself.  I keep bowls of sea glass in my office as a reminder that we can make something positive come out of the negative things that happen in our lives.  There's a saying that's oft repeated in the therapy world that when life hands you lemons, you should make lemonade.  Apparently, when humans hand the sea their trash, it makes sea glass.  

I left the beach with my son's treasures in tow and, when I was later emptying my pockets, was inspired to find a novel experience that could utilize these found items - in particular the sea glass.  My many walks on the beach have led to quite the stash of sea glass sitting in ziplock bags in my aforementioned basement so I had no lack of materials to work with.  As is my habit, I turned to the internet for inspiration and found my idea for the day:  wire wrapped sea glass pendants.

While I did not have the perfect tools to work with, I had some left over wire, wire cutters, basic pliers, and enough sea glass to make thousands of pendants.

After finishing my first sea glass pendant, I found that I was hooked!  I think I may have found a new hobby!

So in closing, I am struck once again by Temple Grandin's theory that all human beings have a need to seek.  Whether a person is a novelty seeker or not, I wonder if we all are happiest when we are actively searching for something.  Or perhaps, at the most basic level, whether we are looking for sea glass or looking for novelty, we are actually seeking out happiness.

Day Eighteen: Seeking out a 1700 lb Chocolate Moose

Ahhh, the weekend!  Although I'm currently not working, (at least not in a traditional sense!), I still let out a huge sigh of relief when Saturday morning finally rolls around.  Perhaps this is due to habit.  Or perhaps it is because there are often so many wonderfully helpful people who come into our home wanting to nurture, play with, and love our children.  But regardless of the reason, I'm very fond of Saturday mornings!  

This morning was typical in many ways.  While my husband caught up on some much needed rest after a week of erratic sleep and too early mornings, my best friend, Angela and I enjoyed coffee, scones, and conversation.  You might remember from earlier posts that Angela has played an integral role in the creation of this experiment so, not surprisingly, conversation turned to how it has been going.  After catching her up on the tremendous amount of support and encouragement I have received, (thank you!) and the surprisingly large number of hits from multiple countries that I have had, (thank you, again!), we got down to how it has been affecting me personally.  And, dear reader, I'm honestly surprised by the huge impact that this project has had on my life in such a short period of time. 

Don't get me wrong...  I fully expected to enjoy the time that I spent experiencing novelty, but I didn't expect anything to be different during the other moments in my life.  I figured I'd have my fun for some amount of time each day, but the rest of the day would be much the same as it always has been.  Instead, I find that I've become increasingly happier and more enthusiastic about life since committing myself to this experiment.  Now, if I had been depressed or even "just OK" before taking this on that wouldn't surprise me.  But I started this project at a time when I was filled with gratitude for the blessings in my life and pretty darn happy with how everything had been going.  So to feel even happier was a total surprise!

As we are both psychotherapists, we, of course, had to analyze and process why this is.  Is it because I had lacked a creative outlet before that the act of writing a blog was filling?  Maybe.  Was it the anticipation of having a mini-adventure each day that brought excitement into my otherwise mundane life?  Maybe.  Was it that each experience was a reminder to return to the present moment and be fully mindful of what I am doing, which in my opinion is a necessary component of happiness?  Maybe, again.  I'm sure that each one of these factors is a piece of the puzzle.  However, the one change I've experienced that has stood out for me more than the others is the fact that each day I wake up feeling as though I am on a mission to seek out a novel experience.  

As I was explaining this to Angela, she made me aware of research that suggests that human beings have a need to be "seeking."  I had never heard of this before, but being the nerd that I am, I have since followed her leads and have done some research.  Some of you may have heard of Temple Grandin, the animal science researcher who has autism and was recently featured in an award winning film?  In her book, Animals Make Us Human, she talks about how the act of seeking is important to animals, (including humans), and is integral to our happiness.  At a basic level, we are hard wired to actively seek out, or hunt for, our food even though modern day conveniences make this completely unnecessary.  So, perhaps the fact that this experiment puts me in a position to be actively seeking something new everyday fulfills this animalistic need, which perhaps was not being fulfilled enough before.

And it is true that I had recently entered a phase in my life in which I wasn't sure what I was working toward.  For the first time in as long as I could remember, I didn't have a particular longterm goal that I wanted to achieve.  I had already sought out and attained the career I had wanted, the family I had wanted...  And while I felt like I SHOULD be happy just sitting back and enjoying the fruits of my labor, in all honesty I had been feeling a little bit lost.  I wonder now if needing novelty was only part of the issue...  Perhaps I needed the "seeking" part of novelty seeking more than the novelty itself!

So, as my conversation with Angela turned to the events of the day, I looked to the internet to find some options for novel experiences close to home.  And, to continue with the seeking theme, we decided to hunt for moose...  Sort of...  In actuality, I discovered that not far from where we live there is the world's ONLY life-sized chocolate moose!  And as we are great lovers of both moose and chocolate, we piled the children into the car and off we went!

Yet another mission was accomplished!  And, as an unexpected bonus, we also tracked down three chocolate bears...  and some very tasty chocolate treats!