Novel Experience Day Forty-Eight: Sweating to the Oldies!

Dear Reader,

I am at a loss.  Just how does one start a blog posting that has anything to do with Richard Simmons?  Particularly, when it is about your attempt to do Sweating to the Oldies 4 with your 2 year-old son?  I guess the only choice I have is to start from the beginning, which takes us back to week one of this project.

During my first week of novel experiences, I spent a great deal of time fending off my fear of starting this experiment and failing...  completely, utterly, and publicly.  I had doubts about being able to identify 365 new experiences, when I've tried so many things in my lifetime already.  I also had doubts about my ability to maintain the myriad other responsibilities and commitments in my life while adding another, sometimes time consuming and challenging, task to the seemingly never ending to-do list.  Of course, I told myself, if it gets to be too much I can always just quit...  

Right.  However, there is one major, characterological flaw with this line of thought:  I am stubborn.  I often tell my clients that stubbornness can be a very good quality - if you direct it toward the right things, like attaining a goal, finishing a health-promoting project, or carrying out an important responsibility to its completion.  And I whole-heartedly believe this to be true.  However, in my case I am, perhaps to a pathological degree, not a quitter.  If I make a commitment, I will follow through, sometimes at high personal cost, to the absolute bitter end.  Knowing this about myself, I try very hard NOT to commit to anything that could be negative or push my life out of balance.  So while, of course, I could always back out of this experiment if it gets to be too much, I knew that if I publicly committed to starting it, I would feel compelled to see it to its completion at almost any cost.  

Note my use of the word "almost."  The major exceptions here are my children.  While I have many other responsibilities in my life, my commitment to my two little munchkins trumps everything else I have going on.  I felt certain that I would choose to quit if the experiment had a negative impact on them.  And while this is positive in many regards, this brings us right back to the fear I had of completely, utterly, and publicly failing.  

Which also brings us back to Richard Simmons!  While I went around in mental circles, knowing that I needed a project such as this one to fill a gap in my life, but fearing the possible negative consequences of committing, I decided to take a jaunt down to my basement and go on a hunt for future novel experiences.  Now, if you have been a faithful reader from early on, you might remember me talking about my basement?  And also about my mother, the fellow novelty seeker, who undoubtedly passed this propensity down to me?  (If not, you may wish to click here before reading on so that you can be up to speed on both matters!)  Well, doing just a little digging I found that I somehow owned a copy of Sweating to the Oldies 4 on VHS!  (Of course.  Doesn't everyone have this lurking in their basement somewhere?!)  So I brought this little gem upstairs and tucked it away for some future cheesy novelty fun.  

It took more than a month, but today I decided to pop this tape in and experience a Richard Simmons workout first hand.  After fast forwarding through all of the advertisements and previews this is what I got:

What a disappointment!  To think that I was given the precious gift of a used Richard Simmon's Sweating to the Oldies VHS tape, and it ends up being broken!  I had a vague memory from my childhood about a tracking adjustment on old VCR's, but my newfangled version does not appear to have one.  However, all was not lost.  Despite the picture, I could clearly hear the song "Shout," with Richard touting the importance of giving ourselves daily hugs.  I also, through the interference, could make out the basics of the dance moves.  So, as I had looked forward to this novel experience for a while now, my stubbornness kicked in and I decided to give it a shot regardless.  By the time the first song was complete, Liam was chanting "No, 'Shout!'  No dance!"  He clearly had had his fill of Richard Simmons.  And, although my original intention had been to complete the entire workout, I allowed my toddler to temper my resistance to quitting and shut the television off.  Clearly, there is much to learn from a two year-old!  

It's time for me to sign off and say "goodnight."  Don't forget to hug yourself today!

Christy

Day Forty-Five: Novel Experiences and Motherhood...

Before I move on to documenting the three novel events that I had today, I need to make sure that one very important fact be stated for the record:  I love being a mother.  In this blog, I have written about loving moments with my son and mindful moments with my daughter.  And these have been some of my favorite posts...  But here's a warning...  Today's post is probably going to be just a little bit different!

First, let me start by saying that today I witnessed yet another novel experience plan go wrong.  A miscommunication between myself and my husband led us to a different unexplored nature preserve than I had planned for.  As the forest path led to a small wooden walkway built on top of a bog, a stroller was not an option.  Therefore, both of my children experienced milestone novel experiences:  Liam had his first long nature walk without an optional method of transport available and Gracie had her first ever walk in the woods strapped snugly into the front pack.

Our walk to the end of the pathway went off without a hitch.  The weather was gorgeous, Liam was cooperative and excited, and Gracie calmly took her surroundings in with an air of fascination.  On our walk back to the car, I was congratulating myself for teaching my children about nature, and exercise, and novelty seeking...  and then novelty hell broke loose!

It started with Gracie blowing out her diaper in the front pack:  Novel Experience Number One.  Now, when I say blowing out, I mean blowing out.  There was baby poop EVERYWHERE, she was in full meltdown mode...  and we had left her just-in-case outfit in the car.  Thankfully, by the time this happened we were relatively close to the end of the path and shouldn't have had more than a five minute walk...  If Liam had not have chosen this very minute to start fighting us about staying on the path, which put him in full meltdown mode as well...  

So with two children screaming in cacophonous unison, one covered in her own feces, the other periodically sitting on the muddy path and refusing to move, we slowly proceeded down the pathway, passing the other hikers who had come out on this beautiful spring day in search of a peaceful walk in the woods.  

As we trudged on at a snail's pace, it became clear that my poopy little wonder was needing to eat...  now!  So, while sending up a little prayer that this would not be the moment a group of teenage boys would meet us on the path, I "pulled off" the trail to "discretely" nurse my hungry little girl...  with my son screaming for his Mama the whole time.  Breastfeeding in the woods:  Novel Experience Number Two.  

FINALLY, we made it back to the car.  There were tears to be wiped away, diapers and clothes to be changed, and cooperation to be bought with stickers.  However, eventually everyone was strapped into their seats and we were on our way to experience Novel Experience Number Three.

In hindsight, dear reader, I know that I have learned an important Mother-Of-A-Two-Year-Old lesson...  Never take your child out to a nice dinner after a day of physical activity...   even if they nap beforehand...  even if they had an immaculate track record of good restaurant behavior before they turned two...  and particularly if you have not been to said restaurant before to scope out it's child-friendliness factors.  

When we pulled into the restaurant parking lot following the 45 minute drive, we had two sleeping babies in the backseat of the car, one of whom needed to be woken up so that we could make our reservation time.  As my angelic sleeping toddler transformed himself into a fully awake little monster I knew that we were in trouble.  While he had had a normal amount of food and rest since our walk, I had not factored the amount of energy he had expended walking on his own on an uneven path for at least a mile...  Before I had fully realized what I had gotten myself into, I was carrying an exhausted two-year-old with low blood sugar through an adult-filled, quiet dining room to the table furthest from the doors.  

At this point, I knew that we were racing the clock.  More sleep was not an option so the child needed sustenance and he needed it fast...  We ordered him orange juice and held him off from his meltdown just long enough for the bread to come out.  As I was sighing with relief about the crisis narrowly averted, my husband took a "too large" piece of bread out of Liam's hands to rip it into smaller pieces...   and our son absolutely lost it.  Leading to Novel Experience Number Three:  Carrying my tantruming child out of a restaurant.  

So it was a day filled with Novel Motherhood Rites of Passage.  The poopy, blown-out diaper in the front pack with no change of clothes, breastfeeding trailside in the woods, and carrying a tantruming toddler out of a restaurant are the flip side of the coin to the first smiles, first "I Love Yous," and first giggles that I've written about before this.  But that's motherhood.  You take the bad with the good, and do your very best to meet everyone's needs and climb up the pyramid knowing that things are changing moment by moment.  Eventually, the coin flips once again, as it did for us tonight, and motherhood becomes a joyous journey of love, learning, and connection.  So, without further ado, let's get to the happy ending of our story.

After Liam calmed down outside and had a little bit more to eat he was perfectly behaved for the rest of our meal.  The food was excellent, Gracie remained asleep the entire time we were out, and Liam charmed all of the people at the surrounding tables.  Our neighbors and the waitresses even commented about how well behaved he was, (clearly there was a shift change during our mealtime!)  We all drove home feeling full and satisfied while Liam chattered on in the backseat about the events of his day.  And this mother, hearing the joy in her son's voice as he recalled the many positive parts of our "walk in woods" and marveling about the impact that this novel experience had, realized that she would not change one moment of this day if she had it to do over again.    

Day Forty-Four: The Cactus Project!

I am a lover of all things green.  I was brought up with gardens, of both the vegetable and flower varieties.  I have worked as a flower gardener at a large University.  I have rooted plants in glasses of water set on a sunny windowsill.  I have planted herb gardens in strawberry pots.  I have started seeds in starter kit "greenhouses."  I have grown vegetables in containers.  And, I have even grown lettuce hydroponically.  

One would think, given this amount of plant-related interest and experience, that I would be a pro at keeping houseplants alive.  However, if one did think this, one would be WRONG!  In my time, I have killed the hardiest of houseplants.  It's not that I have a completely brown thumb.  There have been times in my life when I have kept multiple plants alive for long periods of time.  It's just that as much as I enjoy looking at plants, I just don't seem to enjoy watering them as much!

However, this spring all of this is going to change!  This spring, I am determined to teach Liam about planting seeds, caring for plants, and harvesting vegetables.  Apparently, Grandma had the same idea as we recently received a children's gardening kit for growing tomatoes delivered to our doorstep!  So today was the day for Liam to have the novel experience of planting his first seeds!

Such an auspicious occasion deserves appropriate attire!  So I pulled on an old pair of overalls I have saved for gardening and gestating children.  Thinking that Liam would get a kick out of seeing his mother in overalls just like his, I gestured to the bib.  "Liam!  What are these?"  Without skipping a beat, Liam looked deep into my eyes and  gave his earnest answer...  "Boobies!"  Ummmm....  Right....  

Moving on, we assembled our tools and moved ourselves out to the deck.  The first step in growing tomatoes with Elmo is to add water to these expanding soil pellets.  

Here you can see my smiling boy helping to pour the correct amount of water into the bucket holding the soil pellets...  So far, so good...

Elmo's second step is to mix the soil and water with the provided tools.  Here's where things got a little ugly...

It might be hard to see here, dear reader, but there is an INTENSITY between Liam and his bucket in this picture.  This intensity had been unwavering for nearly an hour, and was punctuated by exclamations of "NO, MUM-MUM!  LIAM do it!!!!"  Now, you may remember that my dear, sweet, boy has just turned two.  Therefore, underneath his cherub-like, innocent exterior lurks a little monster just waiting for the opportunity to rear its head. 

Which brings us to the third step in growing tomatoes with Elmo...  It took some serious convincing to get him to transfer the soil to the cups...  and even more convincing to let me pick up the soil he dropped in the transfer...  As the time passed, my patience shortened and nap time approached...  I pulled out all of my tricks, but step number four, planting the seeds, finally was completed and it was time for a nap...

In this scenario, I think the fact that the kit was labeled for ages 3 and up was more to protect the parents' sanity than a reflection of any safety issue for the little one!  Frankly, I was exhausted.  

Now, originally there had been a planned phase two of Liam's Introduction to Planting that was to occur this afternoon and would double as my novel experience of the day.   However, I'll admit it!  I chickened out!  I just didn't have it in me to revisit the whole dirt/seed debacle with Liam for a second time today.  So, by the dark of night, while my little boy dreamed of soil, shovels, and spades, I pulled out the cactus seeds and soil that I had been hoarding and set to work planting.  I have no idea if the little buggers will even come up...  and if they do they will have to be kept out of reach of my grabby toddler's hands...  but I bet that even I will be able to keep these plants alive...  at least for a while!

Day Thirty-Six: Calling the IRS and Getting the Giggles!

It's that time of year again!  Tax time...  As a self-employed person, taxes are particularly fun.  (Please note the use of sarcasm.)  This year, I have been particularly blessed with some novel snafus and headaches.  While I have largely handled my own insurance billing for my practice, due to some bizarre legalities, it has made sense for me to contract out my Medicaid billing.  Unfortunately, the agency I had affiliated with since the dawn of my private practice stopped paying its 500+ affiliates this past summer.  Then all of the employees walked out at the beginning of the Fall.  Then the agency closed its doors.  Then they filed for bankruptcy.

So, on the brink of going out on maternity leave, I was stiffed thousands of dollars that I had put in extra hours to make in order to cushion my family for my time out of work...  Which stinks.  As a result, myself along with many others hired lawyers and the drama has continued.  However, to add insult to injury, despite being assured that the proper tax forms were going to be sent to us, the end of January came and went without any sign of them.  The lawyer for the now-defunct agency continued to assure people that the form would be sent, and I continued to wait...  and wait...  and wait...  However, today marked the day when it was time for me to get out of denial and face the fact that the form was never going to come.  

Now, there are more than 500 people who are in the same sinking boat, and I have been following their tax-related woes on a listserve.  What I have discovered is that people have been given conflicting information from the IRS.  (Shocking, I know!)  In one scenario, the IRS had to send out an alternate form for us to fill out...  In the other scenario, an entirely different form could be printed from their website.  So, in the interest of CYA, I concluded that I would have to call the IRS directly to find out which option was for me.  As I have never called the IRS before today, this would clearly count as a novel experience!  After getting lost in an endless loop of menus, and having the automated system hang up on me due to ignorance of the non-existent agency's current mailing address, I finally got a real, live person.  And that real, live person told me that I did not have to do ANYTHING at all...  (Scenario number three?)  Which, perhaps is accurate???  Yikes.

So, after an energy-draining day of working on my family's taxes, I was ready to wind down and spend some quality time helping my little girl settle in for a good night's sleep.  I decided  that I should start this process by tickling her.  Clearly, this is an effective part of any child's bedtime routine, right?  So that was what I was doing when it happened...  My baby girl giggled for the first time!  A novelty Yin to balance out all of the Yang!  And suddenly, my day was life-affirming once again!

Day Thirty-Five: Instant Energy!

Today I learned an important lesson:  Not all novel experiences are positive or enjoyable.  However, despite the fact that some novel experiences are not inherently pleasant, approaching it with an attitude of inquiry and curiosity can make the experience interesting.  Which, in a strange way, makes it pleasant and enjoyable after all!

Let me give you some background...  Sadly, since the birth of my daughter, I have become a bit of a caffeine addict.  Now, I do not want to give you the false impression that I am guzzling caffeinated beverages at every turn, for this is not the case.  However, for the first time in my life, I have a sense of NEEDING a cup of coffee every day, preferably first thing in the morning.  As if this isn't bad enough, after a period of time without said cup of coffee I end up with a splitting, caffeine withdrawal headache.

Now this wouldn't be so bad if we actually owned a coffee maker, but, alas, we do not!  There has not been a need....  Until now!  I have been eyeing some of the single serving coffee and hot beverage machines for a while now but have yet to take the plunge and money has been tight since I created this new addiction.  So, as a result, I have been relying heavily upon our local Dunkin Donut's drive-thru for some time now.  

From the information that I have just shared with you, dear reader, you might conclude that my husband is not a coffee drinker.  However, here you would be wrong.  My husband routinely frequents a local cafe on his way to work to get his own caffeinated fix.  However, he has also created a back up plan for the mornings after he has been up all night with our little darlings and is running late...  And here we come to my novel experience of the day.

That would be Starbucks VIA Ready Brew Columbia Coffee...  Which is just a fancy, Starbucks-kind-of-way of describing powdered, instant coffee.  Needless to say, I didn't make it to Dunkin Donuts this morning and the headache was creeping up on me.  So, yes, here is where I admit that I used today's novel experience to feed an addiction.  Ack!  I'm shameless, I know!

Does it make it any less pathetic that I didn't like it?  No...  I think that might actually make it a little bit MORE pathetic, truth be told.  The only part of the experience that was enjoyable was that it was novel and I approached it as such.  Which brings me to a question...  How often are the benefits of novelty due to the open, inquisitive attitude we take in our approach to the experience versus the experience itself?  

So, to channel the Coffee Talk Lady, I'll give you a topic.  Similar to the "attitude of gratitude" that has shown to have such an impact on a person's happiness, does an "attitude of openness and exploration" also provide us with a greater level of enjoyment in our lives?  Discuss!